Tag: Encouragement

These are notes from a recent talk given at Calvary Grace Church’s Women’s Brunch.

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1 Thess 5:14 “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.”

It can be hard to know exactly how to help a sister who is struggling. It’s easy to say (or do) the wrong thing. Or simply say and do nothing because you don’t know what to say. 

Hurting people will tell you that a lot of well-intentioned people have said hurtful or insensitive things to them.

Ed Welch has an article on CCEF called “The Steady Stream of Foolish Words Said to Hurting People”. In it he lists 4 things we should not say when someone is suffering.

• don’t give advice,
• don’t try to solve the problem,
• don’t say you are available any time but don’t offer concrete ways to help,
• don’t try to show your empathy by talking about a similar situation in your own life, and so on. 

You may be wondering what it left to say then? This is the question that we will discuss today. 

Read 1 Thess. 5:12-14. Notice these things:

• Final instructions to the church
• They are instructed in vv 12-13 to respect the elders and esteem them highly because of their work
• They are then commanded to come alongside one another and minister to each other in v 14
• Three kinds of struggling Christians in v 14 that need our care: 
  • idle (unruly, undisciplined, not lining up with what God has for them
  • Fainthearted (discouraged, timid, anxious–perhaps in personality or because trials have been hard on them. 
  • Weak (likely moral and spiritual weakness, ie struggling with temptation, perhaps rattled by ongoing persecution–whatever the case, they are not mature in their faith) 

There are 3 different ways to help these 3 types of struggling Christians

• Admonish the Idle 
• Encourage the fainthearted
• Help the weak “The verb for help (antechomai) presents a graphic picture of the support which the weak needed. It is as if Paul wrote to the stronger Christians: ‘Hold on to them’, ‘cling to them’, even ‘put your arm round’ them.”

Today we will focus on encouraging the fainthearted. This word “translates a compound of oligos (few, or little) and psuchē (life, or soul). It occurs only here in the New Testament….It may indicate a person who is “timid” as a personality trait or one who is “discouraged” at a particular turn of events.” 

This is a person who doesn’t feel courageous and full of faith. They may be going through an intense season of suffering and loss that has worn them down and caused them to become discouraged. They may be grieving. They may feel bruised or like their faith is barely there. Whatever the reason for their struggle, Paul says that these fainthearted Christians need our encouragement.

How do we encourage our fainthearted sisters? 

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3 truths that our fainthearted sisters need to be reminded of.

1. Fainthearted Christians need to know God is with them. 

We can embody this truth by being physically there for our suffering friends, loving them well and listening compassionately as they tell us their struggles. Suffering people need to know that God is with them, not just in theory, but his presence is literally with them in each moment that they are suffering.  

The Psalmist says, (139)

“Where shall I go from your Spirit?

Or where shall I flee from your presence?

8If I ascend to heaven, you are there!

If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!

9If I take the wings of the morning

and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

10even there your hand shall lead me,

and your right hand shall hold me.

11If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,

and the light about me be night,”

12even the darkness is not dark to you;

the night is bright as the day,

for darkness is as light with you.”

This is important for the sufferer to know. There is no trial too deep or place too dark that God’s presence can’t penetrate. He is fully there with them in every moment, in every place.

It doesn’t matter if we feel like God is far away or if we feel like our faith is weak. God is “actually not far from each one of us, for “‘In him we live and move and have our being’ (Acts 17:27)

When people are suffering, God can feel very far from them. Our thoughts can become confused. Is God punishing me? Is He angry at me? Am I angry at him? Why doesn’t he help me? Doesn’t he care?

Our instinct is to turn away and hide our face from God until we get our emotions figured out, but suffering Christians need to know that they can go immediately to God for help and they will find it. God wants us to come to him–even with our angry, bitter and confused thoughts. 

He’s under no illusions about the degree of our sinfulness. He pursued us when we were his enemies. He knows the depths of your sinfulness better than you do, so you might as well talk to him about it. 

God will not turn his back on you when you are swamped by sinful emotions. Because Christ died for those sins. 

Jesus cried out on the cross, “My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?” so that we would never have to. Christ bore God’s wrath for our sins on the cross so that our sin wouldn’t separate us from God.

Romans 8 tells us that we are spiritually joined to Christ so that there is literally nothing that can separate us from God’s love. 

Fainthearted Christians need to know that God is near to them in their suffering and even as they wrestle with their doubts. Because of Christ’s mediating work, they can (and should) bring those doubts and fears to God. Here, they will “receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Heb. 4:16). 

You don’t need a bold faith to approach God’s throne, you just need a genuine faith. You are not saved by the quality of your faith, but by the object–Clint. 

 “A weak hand can receive an expensive jewel” –Sibbes. We all have the same precious jewel of salvation. And that jewel is not diminished by the weakness of the hand that holds it.

So fainthearted Christians can freely go to God with their fears and doubts. Because of Christ, they have the same standing before God as the boldest Christian in the room.

When we are fainthearted, we may imagine there is distance between us and God. But there is none. He is right there with us in our worst trials and deepest fears.

2. Fainthearted Christians Need to Know that Christ Sympathizes with their weakness and will deal tenderly with them. 

Richard Sibbs talks about Christ’s ministry to suffering Christians in his book called The Bruised Reed. Based on Isaiah 42, he divides those who are suffering into two categories: bruised reeds and faintly burning wicks. 

Behold my servant, whom I uphold,    

my chosen, in whom my soul delights;

I have put my Spirit upon him;

    he will bring forth justice to the nations.

2 

He will not cry aloud or lift up his voice,

    or make it heard in the street;

3 

a bruised reed he will not break,

    and a faintly burning wick he will not quench;

    he will faithfully bring forth justice.

This servant —who we know is the Christ—comes to bring forth justice to the nations. And in the midst of his mission, the text says he deals tenderly with bruised reeds and faintly burning wicks.

Who are these wicks and reeds?

Bruised Reeds are being disciplined through trials. They are feeling bruised,  beaten down and weary. Faintly burning wicks are doubting Christians, perhaps struggling with assurance or anxiety. They feel timid in their faith. Their faith is there, it is not extinguished, but it’s small.  

When we are in a season of suffering, it’s easy to imagine that Christ grows tired of hearing our woes. I think we base this assumption largely on our own experience with struggling people. We might feel impatient with our children or someone in the church whose faith is barely there. We may feel exasperated. Why are they still struggling with this? Why haven’t they moved past it? We may be harsh and judgemental toward people who are in a season of bruising and faintheartedness. But Christ isn’t.

a bruised reed he will not break,

    and a faintly burning wick he will not quench;

We know that faintheartedness is not an end in itself. It is not something that a Christian should be content to stay in. God has something better for us. Faintheartedness is a symptom of the flesh at work. It is opposed to the Spirit, not something to glory in (Rom 6–What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it?). We know that we are not meant to be faint-hearted Christians. However, there are seasons of life where weakness is a reality. So it’s important that we talk about it.

When Is. 42 talks about the “smoking flax” and “bruised reed”, these are descriptions of believers. When 1 Thess. 5:14 talks about the “fainthearted” in the church who need encouragement, we know that there are those among us who identify with this description. It’s important that we don’t shame fainthearted Christians into silence. 

If you are a “faintly-burning wick” here this morning, you need to know that there is hope for you, that Christ ministers to you tenderly to you and the church is here to support you.

It’s frustrating to be plagued by doubts and fears. It’s unpleasant and discouraging. But if this you, remember, that Christ will not grow impatient with you. He will not quench your faith altogether. And he will not break you if you are feeling brittle and bruised. 

Christianity is like no other religion in that you don’t have to earn God’s favour. This Suffering Servant died for our sins and rose again. He is completely unique in that he is able to sympathize with our weakness because he took on flesh. (Heb. 4:14-16) He felt every temptation we do, although he was without sin. 

He is God’s Son, 

he is the sacrifice for our sin and he is our high priest who makes intercession for us and sympathizes with us in our weakness. No other god is like him. 

If you are fainthearted here this morning, think of the advocate you have in Jesus Christ! 

Remember, “A weak hand can receive an expensive jewel”. If you have Christ, you have everything. You have access to God’s presence and every spiritual resource in Jesus Christ. Your compassionate high priest is praying for you even now.

3. Fainthearted Christians need to be reminded of God’s promises.

When I was first diagnosed with lupus, I remember feeling scared and grieving the loss of what I considered to be a normal life. And my grandmother encouraged me with God’s promise in Isaiah 41:10. She said it was a lifeline for her when she was going through her cancer treatment.

fear not, for I am with you;

    be not dismayed, for I am your God;

I will strengthen you, I will help you,

    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Notice how God motivates fearful believers to move forward in faith.. He doesn’t say “enough already, get your act together!”. He gives 5 compelling reasons based on His provision for us. 

• I am with you
• I am your God
• I will strengthen you
• I will help you
• I will uphold you with my righteous right hand

This is such good news for fainthearted Christians. And it gives us a clue as to how we should encourage our fainthearted sisters. They need to know that—even though they may feel like a faintly-burning-wick, they can move forward in faith because God will provide what they need.

Sometimes we feel like God’s expectations for us are larger than our actual capabilities. But God always gives us the grace to do what He requires of us. When we are fainthearted it’s easy to feel defeated by all the ways that we fail rather than feeling hopeful that God will provide what he requires of us today.  We need a shift in perspective so that we can stop fixating on our own inability to cope and instead, rest in God’s future grace toward us.

Sibbes says, “He requires no more than he gives, but gives what he requires, and accepts what he gives”.  

In other words, God doesn’t require more from you than he enables you to do. 

And what’s more…whatever you do in reliance on him, he accepts. And He is pleased with it.

Doesn’t that take the pressure off? If you are a fainthearted Christian here this morning, remember you can keep moving forward in faith—not because you are strong—but because God is strong. And he is with you and fights for you. 

Some other promises to consider:

Is. 43:1 “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

    I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

Josh 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

1 Peter 5:6-7  Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, 7 casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Ex. 14 And Moses said to the people, “Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the LORD, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again. 14The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”

These promises are all based on God’s ability and His care for us. Fainthearted Christians have very little life in them. They don’t have the gumption, the strength or the resources within themselves to get their life together. 

What they do have is a strong, compassionate God. And our faintheartedness is almost a blessing in disguise because it teaches us to rely on His strength, not our own. 

When someone is in a state of anxiety, depression or faintheartedness, they will struggle to act because their feelings are so unruly. They can do all of the things: get a good night’s sleep, pray, read their bible…and still these dysfunctional emotions may barely diminish. It’s freeing for a fainthearted person to know that they don’t have to feel in control before they step forward in faith. Rather they step forward in faith because God will provide everything they need that day AND he will accept what he provides. 

4. Faint-hearted Christians need the example of other Christians who continue to press on toward the goal. 

• Heb. 12 talks about the painful necessity of discipline in a Christian’s life. The author encourages the Hebrews to not become weary when God disciplines them. He reminds them that God disciplines his children because he loves them and it “yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.”

• Then he says, “Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, 13 and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed.”( Heb 12:12)  

• The whole church is like a body. 

• Think of a woman’s experience giving birth: big head, displaced tailbone, can’t stand straight, one thing out of line throws off the rest of the body. Having neck pain may be because your hip is out of line. Everything is connected in the human body.

• Notice the whole church is to “lift drooping hands” and “strengthen your weak knees” and “make straight paths for their feet” Why? So that what is lame (read: despondent) will not be put out of joint, but be healed. 

• “The reference to drooping hands and weak knees is familiar imagery in Jewish literature, often used to describe attitudes of discouragement and despair. Here the writer…urges these believers to press on to the goal so that those members of the church who have become despondent (lame) will notice their good example, receive fresh courage and begin to march again rather than fall even further behind. …But if healing is to come, it is not simply the responsibility of the leaders, tireless pastors though they are (13:17), but of every single member.

When the whole church presses on in faith, the lame part of the body begins to heal.  

• When a fainthearted Christian comes to church on Sunday and is surrounded by people singing praises to God, that encourages her faith and helps her to heal.
• When a fainthearted Christian sees you trusting Christ through your trials and hardships, that encourages her faith and helps her to heal.
• When a fainthearted Christian knows you are praying for her and trusting that God will fight for her, that encourages her faith and helps her to heal.
• When you keep speaking truth to her with patience and gentleness, that helps her to heal.

Sometimes we think, “I’m just one person, what can I do?”. But it’s the cumulative effect. When each member is striving to be faithful, the lame members are enveloped in testimonies of God’s faithfulness. They are surrounded by love, encouragement and good godly counsel. 

Fainthearted Christians will naturally want to avoid fellowship because it sort of exposes how much they are floundering. There is an unflattering contrast between the expansive faith of others and their own faintly burning wick.  

If you are fainthearted today, it is really encouraging that you are here. It takes a lot to get yourself to church and meet with other Christians. But the church is God’s gift to you, to help you heal. It protects you from going out of joint and helps you to line up again with what is healthy and good for you. 

You can help your fainthearted friends by making it as easy as possible for them to get to church and other community gatherings. Pick them up, find babysitting for their kids, etc..

Applications:

Nancie Guthrie (What Grieving People Wish You Knew About What Really Helps and What Really Hurts).–put a survey up on her website that asked grieving people wish others understood about grief. Here’s what they said:

4 things grieving people wish you knew

Here are Guthrie’s four things:

If you have someone in your life who is fainthearted. Remember it’s not your job to fix them. You just need to be there for them. If they are grieving, grieve with them. Help them in practical ways. If they are anxious about the future, encourage them with God’s promises, his nearness to them and Christ’s compassionate intercession for them. 

As Paul says in 1 Thess. 5 “Be Patient with them all”. Fainthearted-ness is not a quick-fix scenario. It requires time and patience on our part. They need help and support over the long haul.

Make it as easy as possible for them to come to church and meet with God’s people so that they are surrounded by love, encouragement and good godly counsel. If that’s not possible, maybe offer to communicate with the church on their behalf so that they can be as integrated into body-life as possible. 

One of the best things we can do for our fainthearted friends is to pray for them and believe that God is able to restore to them the joy of their salvation. (Ps. 51).

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Resources Consulted:

• Commentaries:
  • John Stott
  • Raymond Brown
  • D. Michael Martin
• Websites
  • Ed Welch
  • Nancy Guthrie
• Books
  • Richard Sibbes